Tuesday 3 June

There’s no real need to see the latest puppet show imported from the States, Heavy Petting and the Village, when I have my own exclusive gang of glamorous beauties with which to exchange banter, at least for tonight (where are my male friends? Probably all out on dates like the prolific Pekalowski). Cocktails with Sasha, Camilla and Tamsin outside Crow 2 to celebrate the birthday of our gain and theatre’s temporary loss, Bron - a welcome addition to the factory floor. So am I a toxic bachelor, camp confidante, or slinky-tighted Casanova? Pragmatic as ever the gals answer my questions with their own: could I operate the yacht on which Bron is about to stay in the Med? Do I even have my buggy license yet? No. I remain as primitive as the nineteenth century radar I am not yet on.

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